Sugar

...and spice, and everything nice. That's what will fill the Finan household this July when our precious baby GIRL arrives.

We had our second ultrasound appointment this afternoon at 18weeks, 6 days (another week and we will be halfway). At first, Bonzo (Bonza? Bonsai??) didn't want to cooperate; she was all curled up in the fetal position (literally!) with her arms and legs up by her face. She was hiding almost everything. That's when I first knew she must be a girl--already modest.

We got to see her brain, her heart, pumping away, her arms and legs (those strong legs that have been kicking me so often!), and several other organs, etc that Casey and I kept nodding at and acting like we could really identify in the ultrasound. She brought her hand up to her mouth a couple of times like she was trying to figure out how to suck her thumb, but I don't think the thumb ever made it into her mouth, although once she succeeded in hitting herself in the face, which startled her into moving around some and giving us a better view. She did open her mouth once too, which was pretty stinkin' cute.

Finally, she moved her legs enough for us to see the confirmation--IT'S A GIRL. Again, not something I could have recognized, but I trust the technician. Well, sort of--she said the glimpse we got wasn't "the money shot" but that Bonzo has the typical "two lines" that they look for in girls--so we will take it.

It has been an exciting couple of weeks. Just two weeks ago today, I first felt little Bonzo's kicks. I had just eaten a chocolate donut--I think she liked it. After that, I started feeling her move multiple times a day. And all I've wanted to do ever since was sit around with my hands on my stomach waiting to feel her again. I wasn't sure at first, but some of the movements felt strong enough that, with my hand in the right place, I would be able to feel them from the outside.

We tried a few times with Casey's hand on my tummy, but of course, just like at the ultrasound, Bonzo wouldn't cooperate. Wednesday evening, just this week, she hadn't been moving much all day. Then, I climbed into bed and she started kicking, rolling, punching, all sorts of craziness.

Casey laid his head down next to me and I put his hand on my tummy; almost immediately, there was a little burst and Casey gasped. I couldn't believe he felt her. It was so unexpected, and so beautiful.

Life moments I will forever remember. And here are a few pics to cement those memories.

Trying to suck her thumb

Precious little feet

The best one of all--Perfect view of Casey's nose and my lips!

Bedtime for Bonzo

When I was a kid, my dad would often signal bedtime to me and my sisters by saying, "Alright girls, it's bedtime for Bonzo[s]!" I grew up hearing this phrase so often that anytime anyone says the word bedtime, even to this day, I can't help but hear my dad saying, "Bedtime for Bonzo[s]!" Occasionally, I repeat this phrase to Casey upon going to bed at night. He thinks it is ridiculously silly and loses no opportunity to tell me so.

I wasn't sure where my dad picked up the phrase, but Casey's jesting prompted me to ask him. Turns out I could have just googled it-- my dad informed me that Bedtime for Bonzo is an old Ronald Reagan movie, one my dad has never even seen, but he picked up the famous phrase anyway. And Bonzo is a monkey. Probably a fitting phrase to use while putting four young girls to bed.

Recently, our good friend Liz asked Casey and I what we are calling Baby Finan. When we first found out we were pregnant, Baby Finan was the size of an appleseed (so tiny!), so we called him/her Johnny, but that didn't last very long because Johnny quickly grew from an appleseed to a lentil, and from a lentil to a blueberry (s/he is currently the size of an avocado). It was exhausting to rename Johnny every week. So Johnny became Baby, or Little One, or "him" (both Casey and I have boy feelings, which I always thought was very bizarre before being pregnant; how can you have "feelings" about the sex of a baby you can't feel, let alone see? I have a better understanding now, although I think it is largely due to all the myths, which seem to point to a boy). I tried my best to switch the pronouns and give equal treatment to him and her, but him always seemed to be the natural pronoun.

The answer to Liz's question came to me as I was getting ready for bed the other night, and I thought to myself, "Bonzo. Baby Bonzo!" It's perfect. Not only is the nickname cute, I'm sure, if s/he doesn't already, Bonzo will look a little monkey-ish for the better part of at least a year post-birth. What better nickname could we choose? The only problem is that Casey forgets it and therefore has taken to calling him/her Bonzer. :)

This week, Bonzo's eardrums have developed enough for him/her to hear us talking--not our actual words, of course, but enough to get practice recognizing our voices and the patterns of language. So each morning on the way to work, Bonzo and I chat (it's a bit one-sided for now). I begin by telling him/her how much daddy and I love him/her. And how Jesus loves him/her and how God is "knitting you together in my womb [..]because you are fearfully and wonderfully made."  Psalm 139 is with me constantly these days. I am continually amazed that God knows our child already. His works are wonderful!

We then proceed to talk about the upcoming day: about our current unit at school, Romeo and Juliet (h/she even gets to listen to it read aloud each day---this kid is going to be one smart cookie!), the weather, what we will eat for lunch, how much I crave chocolate donuts, and especially, most especially, I tell Bonzo that s/he needs to work on that leg strength, to start kicking me and kicking hard. I know it is still early-ish to feel the "quickening," but I anticipate it eagerly. There are a handful of times when I have thought I felt a flutter of sorts, but being a first time mom, until they get more consistent and more powerful, I don't think I can be sure of what I am feeling.

Even so, I get more and more excited with each passing day. This child growing in my womb becomes more and more of a person, both in form and in personality. Only 24 more weeks until we get to meet face to face!